that day i didn't move to nashville.
if you told me three months ago that would be the title of today's post, i would've rolled my eyes at you and said, "yeah, right. i'm moving." because three months ago, i was so sure of it. i had packing boxes and bare walls and a paper chain to count down the days. of course, that was before things started to fall apart. before i started to fall apart.
yesterday was a pretty weird day, knowing it was the day i was supposed to move and make "someday" turn into today. it didn't really hit me until saturday night, when i suddenly started wondering how different these past few days (and weeks) would've been if i was still moving. i wondered what it would feel like to know that only a few days separated me from my dream. and i wondered if i would ever know what that felt like.
but i know i will. because 'may 6' was a date i talked about a lot in the past few months, but it never felt like a date that would actually come, but it has. moving is something i talked a lot about in the past few years, and even though it feels like something that won't actually come, it will.
also, i always thought that as long as i was living here, i would just work for my mom. but friday was my last day of work. which kind of reminds me of what don miller talks about in a million miles. about how "characters don't really choose to move. they have to be forced." (that's on page 101, in case you wanted to go read about it.) and about how sometimes, characters have to create their own inciting incidents.
quitting my job without having any plans whatsoever is kind of like my own personal inciting incident.