it's like i'm on a train to new york.

back in october, T and i went to new york city on a tuesday night to see the fray. i scored tickets to this private show and there was just no way i could turn that opportunity down. we had a blast and it was such an adventure and you can read more about that here. but what i want to talk about is the train ride.

you see, T spent most of our time on the train worrying about things. how do we know which train it is? how will we know when it's our stop? is grand central the last stop? should we ask someone? how will we get a cab once we get there? obviously, she didn't come out with these questions all at once, without even pausing to take a breath. it was more like, occasionally throughout the train ride, when our chatter and excitement settled down a bit, her worry must have filled the empty spaces and caused her to wonder out loud.

at the time, i thought it was the funniest, oddest thing. my sister, who is four years older than i am and who is known for speaking for me, was completely relying on my knowledge of something that i wasn't totally sure of either. but i knew how to play the role and keep the worry away. you just go and have faith that it'll all work out like it's supposed to.

but sometimes, i feel like i am T, on that train ride to new york, and asking "how will i know?" but for me, it's not just an adventurous, one-night trip to new york city. it's years of my life in a city where no one knows my name and i don't know theirs either. talk about adventurous!

i'm pretty excited about it. i mean, i spend roughly 90% of my waking hours daydreaming about nashville and my future life there, so i guess you could call that excited. or obsessive. but i have my days where the excitement dies down and the reality of it hits me. that's when the worry creeps in and causes me to wonder. how will i know when i'm supposed to move? is it may? what if it's not? what if it is? what then? how will i know what to do? and what happens once i get there?

i just have to keep reminding myself to have faith. because everything's going to work out like it's supposed to.

after all, that plan worked when we were in new york, right?