february.

HAPPY LEAP DAY.

1. a little piece of nashville came to connecticut in the form of gabe dixon playing at the space. such a lovely way to start out the month.

2. i watched the super bowl. or, at least, stayed in the room for the entire thing. believe it or not, i don't think i've ever done that before. usually, i'd spend all of super bowl sunday writing essays or reading for school, but even when i didn't have work to do, i'd never last long. football is BORING. (i much prefer the soccer kind of football, if you know what i mean.)

because i know you're wondering, my friend leah and i spent the entire game chatting about i don't even know what. that was the week we saw each other like, every day. somehow we always have something to talk about. and, every once in a while, she'd look at the tv and make a comment about the game. my favorite was when, towards the end, she asked, "wait, since when are the giants winning?" clearly, we were paying a lot of attention.

3. i read the hunger games. i've mentioned it a few times (and i'll mention it again when i post about my february reads), but it needs it's own spot on the list because it literally took up an entire week. not kidding. i did nothing else during the week i read the series. including posting "i'd rather be reading the hunger games" blogs.

4. the grammys were on! i posted about it here. i still think dave should've won for 'best country song.'

also, the academy awards were on this past sunday, but i'm a music person, so i wasn't as dedicated to watching or posting about it. also, i'm pretty sure the only reason i watched the majority of it was because i was sick and couldn't sleep.

5. i have taken the first steps to make it official that i am moving to nashville in may. unless something happens to stop me, it's happening. (asdfghjkl. i CANNOT tell you how excited/scared/thrilled i am about this.)

6. i got to spend some quality time with alexis and aiden, which i mentioned in this post. and they were here again last thursday night until saturday morning. the whole family was here this time, so it was fun catching up with melissa and kyle too. and i did snap a few photos this time!

they put their hoods on and stood together and said, "can you take our picture?" cutest. thing. ever. i am in love with them.

7. some of the best new music got released this month. the fray, sugar & the hi lows, gro. yeah.

8. i got sick last week, which i have been posting about and am still recovering from. writing was the only thing i could do that helped take my mind off of it, so i wrote. a lot.

9. i worked out this many times this month:

the beginning of the month is no excuse. mid-month, i decided that, since it seemed like everyone was getting sick, i should take advantage of my health and run on the treadmill while i still could. and then the next week i got sick. so that's that.

10. i read four books this month. twice as many as i planned to. but i'll post more about that tomorrow.

11. bonus! since february has an extra day, i figured i'd include an extra point. last month, i went to hillsong/nyc and heard an incredible message from carl lentz that has really stuck with me since i heard it. he was talking about acts 16:25-26, which says this:

about midnight paul and silas were praying singing hymns to God, and the other prisoners were listening to them. suddenly there was such a violent earthquake that the foundations of the prison were shaken. at once all the prison doors flew open, and everyone's chains came loose.

and everyone's chains came loose. meaning, your worship may break someone else's chains. i don't know about you, but i just think that's really incredible.

–– s

tuesday tunes – on tuesday!

being sick has totally messed up my blogging schedule. among other things, but the blog is most important. clearly. anyway, my point is that one of my issues while being sick is my eyes and the fact that there are times when keeping them open hurts. looking at things hurts. watching tv hurts. i didn't even try reading, but i might as well add that to the list. and, of course, looking at a computer screen hurts. there were small windows where my eyes were okay and i'd try to hurry up and be productive. on sunday, i drafted three blogs in my window. (i know. high-five to myself.) unfortunately, none of those three blogs were a tuesday blog.

i'm not going to try to explain what that means. just go with it.

anyway, i was still in so much pain yesterday and i kept randomly crying all morning because being in pain for seven whole days (combined with a serious case of sleep deprivation) does that to a person. so i called the doctor and went in for an appointment and basically this is what happened: he told me that the medicine i was given at the hospital on friday are not very strong, he looked in my ears and throat and whatever else and told me i have a sinus infection and an ear infection, then he gave me stronger medicine and told me i should feel better in two days. TWO DAYS. hello, light at the end of the tunnel.

but here's my question. if i went to the emergency room at 3 a.m. on friday morning because i was in SO MUCH PAIN that i couldn't stand it anymore, why would the doctor give me weak medicine?

whatever. i have the good stuff now and i am, in fact, feeling much better already. i actually got some quality sleep last night. thank goodness.

and, since it's tuesday (new music tuesday!) and i'm not working, i have some great things to talk about. are you ready?

green river ordinance –– under fire
oh my gosh, i cannot describe to you my love for this band. i discovered them completely unexpectedly at my first needtobreathe show. they were the first opener that didn't make me want to plug my ears. in fact, i was sitting down when they first came on and, by the end of their set, i was standing and singing along. yeah. they've been through a lot–getting signed and then walking away from the label–and they're finally releasing their first LP in three years. i could not be more stoked, and it was well worth the wait.
favorite tracks: "under fire," "healing touch," & "crawling" / itunes

andrew belle –– daylight EP
you know, andrew belle just has one of those voices. when my itunes is on shuffle, i instantly know when his songs come on because his voice is one of a kind. i cannot get enough of it. honestly, i sort of forgot how great he is and was a bit hesitant to buy the ep, but it only took me about 10 seconds of listening to remember why i needed to have it.
favorite tracks: "the daylight" & "sky's still blue" / itunes

i'm sure there are more goodies out there this week, but for the sake of my eyes and my credit card bill, i'm not looking very hard. besides, if you've got these two new albums, you're set.

–– s

making progress.

jon acuff wrote, in his post about surrender, "surrender is not the end of a beautiful life. it is the beginning." and as i quoted that in my post last week, i thought about the progress i've made since i first read those words. it really changed my way of thinking about a lot of things. or everything.

for weeks, i had been frustrated with God because i felt like He had given me this dream, but He was keeping the doors sealed shut so that it couldn't come true. my relationship with Him changed because i didn't understand. why would He do that? was i not supposed to move at all? why can't i go yet? my prayers were filled with only these questions because i didn't know what else to say.

and then i read that post, and those words, and i realized that i was the problem. i was holding on so tightly. too tightly. and in that, i wasn't trusting God. once i realized that, i started working towards letting go and trusting more. obviously, this isn't an overnight process, but little by little, i was making progress.

and i found out that surrender really is the beginning of a beautiful life. you know why? because things started to happen. and the next thing i know, i'm moving to nashville in may.

–– s

[this is me documenting my story & the things i've learned along the way in blog-form.]

sick day #3.

am i seriously still sick? what? well, yesterday, i thought for sure i was getting better. i woke up to find my throat was ON FIRE, but once i took medicine, it was fine. i spent the day thinking i was finally getting over my cold and it was all happy and lovely until about 10 p.m. when my ears suddenly felt like someone pushed my head straight to the bottom of the pool.

i couldn't lay down, i couldn't lean over, i couldn't tilt my head to one side or the other. even just sitting still, it felt like my ears were going to explode at any second. both of them. it was awful. beyond awful. and it was only 10 p.m.! i still had ALL night to wait until i could go to the doctor.

i tried some little things like decongestant and tylenol and googling and watching tv (because what's better for pain than a nice distraction?), but nothing worked. somehow, i eventually managed to fall asleep sitting up in my bed (what?) and when i woke up an hour or two later, the pain was unbearable.

so i went to the emergency room at 3 a.m. and got medicine and oh my gosh. i've had some bad days, but this week has been the worst.

and here's to another late post this week. but whatever.

–– s

sick day #2.

yesterday was actually quite a productive day, despite the fact that it was sick day #2. also despite the fact that i spent the majority of it watching an embarrassing number of episodes of how i met your mother. (i'm well into season 4, in case you're wondering. but i won't say which episode i was on when i started watching yesterday morning.) (and no, it wasn't season 1, thankyouverymuch.) anyway, here's a quick rundown of my day that did not include himym:

1. took a shower, brushed my teeth, did my hair. (on a sick day, this is quite an accomplishment.)

2. prepared for myself three meals, plus a snack. (on any day, this is quite an accomplishment.)

3. went to the chiropractor & got adjusted. (my headache is FINALLY gone. oh my gosh.)

4. changed my sheets.

5. cleaned up my room. (clearly, i had an incredible burst of energy.)

6. did some other productive things (like write & read my bible) that do not involve watching netflix.

7. loaded the dishwasher with the dishes that were in the sink, which by the way, were not mine.

yeah. i just kept thinking, "when i live in nashville and i get sick, i won't have anyone to do this for me." so that's what motivated me to do things for myself. it's like i'm practicing! and i even kept up with my blogging, too. how impressive is that?

now if you'll excuse me, there are more episodes of himym for me to watch.

–– s

sick day.

oh my gosh. yesterday was miserable. i mean miserable. i woke up with a sore throat, but it was more like it was just really awkward to swallow and not so much painful, and a headache like no other. and that's the worst part, i think. you can't sit up because you're tired, but you can't lay down because your head hurts to lay it on the pillow. AND i had a fever all. day.

basically, what all of this means is that i was in an awkward sitting/laying position under my covers in my bed, shivering, and taking my temperature about every 45 minutes because there was nothing else to do. i tried watching tv on hulu at one point, but my headache made it pretty much impossible to do anything. including sleep.

every once in a while though, i'd wake up and find that i had fallen asleep in the most awkward/uncomfortable position ever and my neck would be so sore. which only did wonders for my headache, let me tell you.

but, i made it through. only now, my headache is slightly less intense (which means i can lay down now–thank goodness) and my sore throat has turned into the kind that feels like i'm swallowing knives. no fever though!

i hate being sick.

–– s

the beginning of a beautiful life.

now that i knew what i wanted, for real, getting from point A (connecticut) to point B (nashville) is like an advenure in itself. lots of little lessons included.

the first thing that comes to mind when i think about the future (my future) is that God gives specifics on a need-to-know basis. and His definition of need-to-know is not the same as my definition of need-to-know. if you know what i mean.

next, i learned that He doesn't need any help.

for example, last year i had this goal to be packed up and moved out by january. of 2012. (hi, it's february. this didn't happen.) the thing is, i knew i didn't have enough money to make the move when i made this goal, so i hunted around for another job so that i would be able to achieve this goal. basically, i was getting another job so that i could make my dream come true by myself.

re-read that last sentence. it's very self-centered, isn't it? yeah. so that's why, when i was offered a job that i applied for, i turned it down. because God doesn't need any help getting me to where i need to be. money is no obstacle for Him. if He really wanted me in nashville by january, i'd be in nashville by january. no second job was going to change that.

however, i learned very quickly that even though you know you need to let go, or even loosen your grip on your dream, that doesn't mean that you do. sure, i turned down the job, but i was still holding on very tightly. i wasn't taking control, but i wasn't giving it up either.

until i read this post about surrender by jon acuff.

it's a pretty non-specific post about how we think of surrender as "letting go of something amazing in exchange for something average." but he included this bit about dreams that really got me. "this is the lie of chasing your dream: that when you let go of your plans and trust God’s, He will call you into a mission that you will hate."

okay, because i honestly thought that if i let go of my plans, God wouldn't step in and put the pieces together for me. i thought that if i let go of this amazing dream, God would keep me stuck in my average life. and that terrified me.

one more thing. jon ended his post with these words and so will i because it's like icing on the cake. (which we all know if the best part. obviously.)

"surrender is not the end of a beautiful life. it is the beginning."

–– s

[this is me documenting my story & the things i've learned along the way in blog-form.]

oh, hi.

i'm posting this late. i know. (although, you probably don't know that. unless you sit at your computer each morning and wait for my awesome blogs to be posted.) (hahaha–wouldn't that be nice?)

i had a long weekend. and by that i mean, it was the exact same length as every other weekend, i just packed a lot more into it than i normally do. let's recap, shall we? because i know you're just dying to know about the events of my weekend.

friday night was spent hanging out with my super cute 2 and 4 year old cousins. second cousins, technically. i had such a fun time coloring and playing legos and making mac&cheese for dinner and sitting on the couch, chatting with alexis, who's 4. we talked about things like how old she is and how she thinks i should get married in june (ha!). of course, this was coming from a 4 year old, who's parents were out at a rehersal dinner for her uncle. aiden (2) pretty much did his own thing, unless bailey (my dog, a miniature schnauzer) got too close to him or looked at him or anything like that and he'd look at me and say, "eh! eh! eh! can you hold him??"

they are so cute. so cute. and i have zero photos to show for it because i didn't take any. don't ask me why. but it was probably because i was too busy making sure there was at least five feet between them and bailey at any given time.

they slept over, in my room, so i was up by 7:30 a.m. on saturday. my mom took over from there though, and i managed to get a couple more hours of sleep. after that, i went on the treadmill (for the first time in over three weeks!), got some reading in, took a random trip to target for nothing in particular (but ended up with more than i needed–of course), and went to the movies. (i saw the vow again with my friend val, who hadn't seen it yet.) (my thoughts about it are pretty much the same.)

on sunday, i went to hillsong/nyc again. and, again, it was fantastic. i love that i live close enough where i can visit every few weeks, but i don't love that i live far enough where i can't regularly attend. make sense? that pretty much took up my entire morning and afternoon (not complaining) and i spent my evening at merge (the youth group at clg).

i guess it probably doesn't sound like a lot (or maybe it does because this post is rather wordy), but it was. especially for someone who's main excitement of the weekend involves painting her nails. the only down time i really had this weekend was when i took that nap on saturday morning.

oh, and by the way, i'm not late in posting this because i got to sleep in on this lovely presidents' day and i'm just now getting around to posting it. i'm late because i didn't have time to draft something this weekend, and then i had to get up for work today.

yeah. but tomorrow, i will be back to my regularly scheduled posting.

–– s

the hunger games.

okay, quick summary– the book (well, the first book) is about a group of kids who are forced to fight to the death on live tv in the annual hunger games, which serve as a reminder to the nation that the capitol is in charge.

yeah.

initially, i was a little skeptical about reading it, for obvious reasons. i saw a preview for the movie a while ago and, while i was intrigued enough to want to see the movie, i didn't feel like i needed to read the book.

and then, a few weeks ago, i was online (okay, i was on tumblr) and i saw a few posts about it that made me change my mind. i think it was a combination of finding out that there are actually three books in the series (which tells me it's probably about more than kids trying to kill each other to survive) and finding out that the movie doesn't come out until march (which is plenty of time to read the book), but i decided to go for it.

when the guy behind the counter saw my selection, he made a comment about how great the series is. it reminded me of that time i bought twilight and the man asked me, "you're only buying the first one?" this guy, like the man who sold me twilight, obviously knew i wasn't going to just stop after the first book. but, honestly, i was really wondering if i would end up back at the store a few days later to return it.

instead, i was back at the store a few days later to purchase the next two books, just as the guy behind the counter could've predicted.

it took me less than a week to read all three books. there is just something about the story and the way it's written and the characters–i fell in love with them. and, while i knew basic elements to the story from the movie previews, i knew nothing else about it. so i was reading and discovering and not knowing what to expect. it was such a fun experience to do it that way.

of course, i would say more about it (i could talk for hours about these books!) but i don't want to give too much away. although, i will say this. it's not your typical feel-good story. it's real (while also science-fiction) and it's harsh and some parts are funny but other parts are heartbreaking. after i finished reading them, i felt like i needed days to recover. especially since i read through them all so quickly.

so, now that it's been a week since i finished them, i feel like it's an appropriate time to post about it. and maybe start reading them all over again.

–– s

dreaming big.

[photo credit]

sometimes, when i think about moving to nashville, i take a deep breath and then i hold it. because, sometimes, i just get so overwhelmed with it all. the what if's break me down and i get scared. i start to doubt myself and my faith and i wonder if i'm making the right choice, or if i'm a fool for trying to mess with what's already an okay life.

and then i run across something like what you see in the photo above and it's like i can breathe again. because, oh yeah, dreams are supposed to scare you. if it was too easy, it wouldn't be worth it.

so the next time fear tries to pull me down, i will push that much harder. because i know i must be doing something right.

–– s

the usual wednesday post.

my valentine's day was actually quite wonderful, thanks for asking. i went to the movies with my friend leah and we saw the vow. the movie was pretty okay. it was based on true events, which made it that much better and that much worse at the same time. i liked it, but it's not my favorite.

moving on.

noisetrade has a new sampler out. 25 love songs.
i don't care if valentine's day was yesterday, go download them anyway. since when do you need it to be valentine's day for you to enjoy a good love song? yeah, since never. plus, noisetrade always has the best samplers. i still listen to their fall sampler on occasion. they sure do know how to pick them. not to mention that there's also lots of NEW music included as well. and, it's free. FREE. so, what are you waiting for?

other new music worth noting, which have no descriptions because i haven't actually purchased them yet due to the fact that i've already spent too much money this week:

the hunger games soundtrack (pre-order)

sugar & the hi lows –– sugar & the hi lows

dave barnes –– white flag (single)

dave barnes –– stories to tell (pre-order)

elenowen –– run (single)

eric hutchinson –– watching you watch him (single)

all of these came out yesterday, with the exception of the eric hutchinson single, which came out last week.

and here's the part where i schedule this to post and then i hide my computer so i won't be tempted to impulsively purchase all of these things. honestly, it wouldn't really be that big of a deal if i did, but i'm trying to exercise some self control here.

but do you see what's on that list?

–– s

so let's talk about the grammys.

if i was really on top of my game, i would've drafted this as i was watching the grammys and had it queued to post yesterday. but, you know, i'm not. actually having something to post every single day is still quite a feat for me.

so i put on e! a couple hours beforehand, looking for some red carpet coverage with the fabulous ryan seacrest, but all i found was extended commentary on the life and death of whitney houston. which, don't get me wrong, was totally relevant, but there's only so many ways you can say how great she was and what an impact she made and how sad it is that she's gone before it all starts sounding redundant. plus, i was looking for the pretty dresses and the interviews with the "who are you wearing?" q&a's.

i ended up googling "grammys red carpet" and was not disappointed to find that red carpet coverage was streaming live online. and not only that, but you had three different options of what you could watch online: the interviews, the awards (because most of them are given out before the actual show starts), and the regular red carpet deal where you simply see all the pretty people walking by and posing for the paparazzi. and each of them had a live feed going at the bottom of the page, so you could be watching the interview portion while also keeping an eye on who was winning in case you wanted to switch over and catch their thank-you speech.

pre-show thoughts:

1. still confused as to why ryan was not on the red carpet. (although, maybe he was eventually and i just gave up too soon.)

2. dave barnes on the red carpet? so much love for him.

3. as much as i love t-swift, dave TOTALLY should've taken home the grammy for 'best country song.'

4. the civil wars! TWO grammys! best folk album & best country duo. well deserved. here's their post-win interview.

i only watched a limited amount of pre-show. there are just so many people, and so many people who i don't even know, and i felt like it was dragging a little bit after i found out that dave didn't win. but you can bet i was glued to the tv once 8 o'clock rolled around.

thoughts on the actual grammys:

1. ll cool j? i wasn't aware that he was the award-show-host type, but i was pleasantly surprised with his hosting abilities. #firstimpression

2. he literally paused to pray for whitney houston and her surviving family. #amen

3. no, i will not include a hashtag with each point i make. although that might be kinda fun now that i think about it.

4. i'm no fan of bruno mars, but he put on a pretty stellar performance.

5. LOVE kelly clarkson. loved her dress, too. (although i kept that opinion to myself after my parents both made comments about how low it was and how "she could easily have a wardrobe malfunction in that dress.")

6. did jason aldean's microphone cut out at the end there, or was that just me? #oops!

7. @andylevy had this to say about chris brown: "#grammys: sad about drug abuse, couldn't care less about physical abuse." #AGREED

8. part of the grammy fun was being on twitter and reading people's reactions. (@jonacuff was cracking me up the whole time.)

9. i could've done without the rihanna portion of the rihanna/coldplay performance.

10. "we'd like to thank all of our opening acts tonight." - john paul white of the civil wars. so perfect! i love them. why did they not get a whole 3-minute time slot for a full song? theirs was one of the best and it was only half of a performance. (click here to watch!)

11. t-swift performed "mean" and changed the lyrics in the last chorus from "someday, i'll be living in a big ol' city" to "someday, i'll be singing this at the grammys." #genius #LOVEher

12. neil patrick harris presenting 'song of the year'? i literally squealed when he walked out on stage and sat straight up in my seat. it's really too bad that he's gay.

13. do i need to mention that adele won 'song of the year' for "rolling in the deep"? she basically dominated the evening. no shock there.

14. yes, there were, in fact, some awards presented in between the mini concerts.

15. 'best country album' went to own the night by lady a, which is a great album, don't get me wrong, but i think t-swift deserved this one, based on the fact that she wrote every song by herself and it is truly an amazing album.

16. adele's performance? i have no words for this. perfect. amazing. beautiful. all of the above.

17. 'best new artist' went to bon iver. #YES

18. also, he had the best, most awkward thank-you speech of the night. i should try to find it on youtube and post it.

19. jennifer hudson's whitney houston tribute? #goosebumps.

20. okay, nikki minaj? i don't even want to mention this performance because it was so awful. how did she get a longer time slot than the civil wars? seriously? #makeitstop

and those are all the notes i had jotted down in my notebook. yes, i took notes. (i'm a writer, do you expect anything else?) (and it was a 3.5 hour-long program. how do you expect me to remember it all without writing something down?)

i realize i did miss quite a bit, like the beach boys reunion – which was probably directly related to the fact that i was too busy drooling over adam levine and his hottness to write anything down, but you know what? whatever. you can't win them all.

unless you're adele. then you do win them all.

–– s

NASHVILLE.

it was decided: i was going back to school for the spring semester (well, technically the winter session) as a communications major. and this book my career counselor gave me, with all the useful music business info in it, also talked about the best locations for the job i wanted. here's the part where i was thrown for a loop.

three cities were listed for music-industry jobs: new york, los angeles, and nashville.

new york? well that just fits PERFECTLY with the plan i had earlier. los angeles? also a win. i've never been there, but i did have that phase where i wanted to move there. nashville? not so much. i've never even thought about visiting there, let alone living there.

i'm sure you can guess which one of these citied jumped out at me when i saw the list.

yeah. NASHVILLE.

i was shocked. i'm pretty sure my first thought was, "BUT NEW YORK WAS ON THE LIST." and my second thought: "ARE YOU SURE?" yes. there was a lot of yelling going on in my prayers. not so much because i was angry, but because i was confused. and very surprised.

but then i remembered something i had prayed for a few months before. it was after a conversation i had with my parents about new york that did not go in the direction i wanted it to go in. they just weren't convinced that new york was where i was meant to be. my prayer went something like this: "God, if i'm not meant to live in new york, then don't let me want to live in new york."

i didn't think it would work. partly because i didn't think it could work, and partly because i didn't want it to work. honestly, i wanted to want new york. i liked having a dream that big and i was scared of what would happen if it went away. but God didn't take away my big dream, He simply replaced it with another, much better one.

so i stopped wondering why, i stopped wanting new york, i stopped wanting my dreams. and i started wanting His dreams, i started wanting nashville, and i started to be grateful. after all, this is what i had asked for.

you know, having faith is kind of like going on an adventure. because you take risks that scare you like nothing else, and then God blesses you and answers your prayers and gives you things you didn't even know to ask for.

–– s

[this is me documenting my story & the things i've learned along the way in blog-form.]

heart of me.

just because, i am in love with this song and they have a new album coming out in three weeks and i can't wait to see them again in april.

and, let's face it, i'd rather spend my time reading than writing a blog post. i'm on mockingjay now! so close to finishing, and then i will get back to my regularly awesome blogging.

heart of me, by green river ordinance.

–– s

lunchtime post.

i was in the shower this morning, washing my hair, when i suddenly realized i forgot to write a post for today. for a second, it felt like my stomach dropped, the same way it does when you walk into class and realize you forgot to write that essay that's due in five minutes. and i started worrying about what i was even going to write about and when i was even going to write it because it's not like i have loads of extra time in the morning. in fact, this morning i was running a bit late because i hit another button on my alarm clock instead of the snooze button and it turned off, but my alarm was still set so i thought it would go off again nine minutes later. but it did not.

and here's the moment when you think to yourself that my life must be pretty easy if all i have to worry about is whether or not i am able to post a blog on time. or, if you're like me, you're thinking that if i tweeted about this, it would no doubt have the hashtag #firstworldproblems.

but really, all of these things ran through my mind in about .7 seconds. and then i started laughing at myself, because the main reason i forgot to write last night was that i was reading catching fire. and it's absolutely ridiculous how much i'm not doing other things just so i can read for a few extra minutes.

the other reason i forgot about writing last night was that i had dinner at T's. (i don't know if i've mentioned it before, but josh and i go to T and lee's every week for dinner and a movie.) so it wasn't like i just sat around reading all night and got absolutely nothing accomplished.

we ate pizza and watched drive, with ryan gosling. honestly, i had no idea what the movie was about, and i heard it was bad, but i still wanted to watch it anyway because, hello, ryan gosling. josh bought it because he wanted to watch it and he buys movies the same way i buy books. for some reason we feel the need to have a new copy. so we watched it and it turns out, drive is not really my kind of movie, what with all the language and blood and exploding heads and all. (i didn't actually see the girl's head explode when she got shot because i closed my eyes, but josh told me it happened.)

i will say this though, ryan gosling is super attractive and i would totally marry him in a second.

–– s

scars & stories.

first of all, is there other new music out today besides the fray album? because that's ALL I CAN LISTEN TO. i literally cannot get enough of it. can. not. i know i said that last week when it was streaming on itunes and i was all excited, but this week, i own it. it's mine and it's on my ipod and i can listen to it whenever and wherever i want.

second of all, that was actually an honest question. i haven't even been to the itunes store to see what else came out today (yesterday, by the time you read this). two reasons: one) i am not going to spend money on music that i know i won't be listening to anytime soon, so why even look? (but i probably will take a peek tomorrow and i may or may not post about it. we'll see.) and two) i'm currently in the middle of reading the hunger games series (i'm about half way through catching fire) and, if you've read them before, you know that any free minute is spent with katniss and peeta, either crying or aww!-ing or dropping your jaw out of shock.

i'm not kidding. i have other things to do, even more important than blogging, and they're just not getting done. like sleeping, for example. i wanted to be in bed 43 minutes ago, but chances are, i'm going to go read one more chapter after i'm done writing this.

third of all, ANYWAY, let's get back to the music. here's my usual bit about new music tuesday:

the fray –– scars & storiesthis album is just, oh my gosh. so, so good. there are no words to describe it. but it kind of reminds me of their first album in that i love every song so much, for different reasons, and i always end up listening to the album straight through without skipping any songs. i think it also sounds similar to their first album. i'm doing a terrible job at trying to explain myself, so you should probably just do yourself a favor and buy it already. itunes has a deluxe version, which i highly recommend, because those extra songs are SO worth the extra three dollars.
favorite tracks: if i HADDD to choose, i'd say "the wind," "rainy zurich," & "maps" (which is a bonus track and also a cover of the yeah yeah yeah's song). / itunes

also, someone posted this screencap on tumblr, with the caption "favorite thing about the fray's new website." so funny. (and, as of right now, it's still there so you can see for yourself.)

–– s

gabe dixon / 02.02.2012

[image stolen from leah's instagram.]

so thursday night, leah and i went to the space, which is a music venue in hamden that i sometimes work at, to see gabe dixon, a musician from nashville who was also a part of ten out of tenn, vol. 4. we're not huge fans, but we love nashville and tot and when someone like that comes to ct, you have to show some support and make it look like ct has somewhat of a music scene.

brian jarvis, who is actually pretty great, opened. he's from manchester, which we found out by some spontaneous googling during his performance. leah and i signed up for his email list because this sweet girl came over with the list and the smoothest writing pen i have ever used. although, he will be getting my email once again when i download his music from noisetrade, which we found out he has from his tumblr blog that i found through google. at one point, he was talking about gabe being from nash and he asked if anyone had ever been to nashville. i was in the middle of sending a text, but as soon as i realized what he said, my hand shot straight up in the air. it turns out, i was the only one in the room who's ever been to nashville.

lelia broussard played next. she's young and cute, but SUPER awkward on stage. i mean, when she's singing, she's fine. as long as she has a guitar in her hands. but when she talks in between songs? all i could think was, "oh honey, just stop talking and start singing again." but has some serious potential. her set was 45-ish minutes, but it felt like three hours. leah and i had a lot of fun during her set being random and awkward and singing along to that one song she asked us to sing along to.

gabe dixon played last and, while he's a really talented musician, his style doesn't exactly line up with my style, so i'm not in love with his music, but it was a pretty great show. his banter in between songs was entertaining and much better than lelia's, who's name we still can't figure out how to pronounce, by the way. at one point, before he sang "on a day just like today," he talked about trent dabbs and leah got all giddy and then he mentioned tot and i woo!-ed because i am a tot fan and he was like "oh! we got some fans in here." then he proceeded to say he didn't think they came to ct on the tot tour, but apparently ct came to them. OH WE SURE DID, GABE. WE SURE DID. after that, he sang this song that he wrote for his wife, which was super cute because he told the story of how he wrote it and i just eat that stuff up. so adorable. his set was approximately a hour long, but the first half went by really fast. and then his songs seemed to get longer and my eyes got heavier and leah and i went back and forth about whether or not we were going to leave before it was over because, while the show was in ct, it was still a 45 minute drive home.

we ended up staying until it was over and then we left and practically died laughing the entire way home. i have no idea what we talked about, but i had tears coming down my cheeks from laughing so hard about things that are really only funny at midnight on a thursday night.

going to work on friday was brutal, but totally worth it.

–– s

solid ground.

after dropping my classes mid-semester, i spent the next few months talking to a career counselor, who either thought i was insane or exactly like every other confused student she had ever talked to. either way, she was nice about it and did her best to help me out. she talked to me and told me little tricks to try to figure out what it was that i wanted to do. i couldn't explain it to her that it wasn't just about what i wanted to do. that's how i got myself into this mess in the first place. but then she asked me if i'd ever seen a movie or a tv show with a character who had a really awesome job that i would like to have and it all unfolded rather quickly after that.

you see, audrina from "the hills" worked at epic records, which is the label that the fray is signed to, and i wasn't exactly sure what she did, but i always wanted to know because it seemed like a cool job. so i googled and found out that she worked in the a&r (artists & repertoire) department, which is basically the part of a record label that chooses which bands to sign and whatnot.

BAM. that was it.

i told my career counselor about it and she got me this book with all these facts in it about what it takes to work in a&r and what kind of college majors are the most helpful when you want a career in the music industry. since i didn't go to the hartt school, i chose the next best major: communications.

step one, done. i could go back to school the following semester, which was something i kept reminding myself to have faith about because i didn't want to be one of those people who 'took a semester off' and never ended up going back. not that there's anything wrong with that, but it's not what i wanted for myself. i at least knew that much.

so i had a new major and a new direction to go in. that's the other thing about faith. it's amazing what God does for you when you take a huge leap for Him. He gives you solid ground to land on.

–– s

[this is me documenting my story & the things i've learned along the way in blog-form.]

alreadysleeping.

it's almost 1 a.m. and i can't think about anything but how much i want to be sleeping right now. but i have to post something. i would take the easy way out and just post a great music video or a blog post that caught my attention and call it a night (...like i did last week), but that would require me to think about which one i want to post. and i am just not able to do that at this point.

you know, i thought about drafting a post earlier today because i knew i'd be out late, but i was going to a show and i thought it would be better if i waited so i could write about the show after i got back.

...WHY WOULD I EVER THINK THAT?

i had a super fun night though, which i would love to tell you about when i don't have less than five hours before i have to be up for work.

–– s

good reads: january.

my goal is to read (at least) two books every month in 2012. so far, it's been a success! one month down, eleven more to go.

a million miles in a thousand years by donald miller
this was the first don miller book that i bought, and read. back around the time it first came out, i heard great things about it from the people i follow on twitter. someone eventually posted a photo of the author's note and that's when i decided to read it. i have this thing about not being able to read "used" books, i went out and purchased my own copy. hardcover and all.

i read it through, although probably to quickly, and loved every page. max lucado is quoted on the back cover saying, "i already want to re-read this book." YES. exactly.

three or so years later, i just re-read it. again, i loved every page. there's something about the combination of his writing style and the way he talks about life as a story that makes me feel inspired and motivated, which are two great things.

favorite chapters:

a character is what he does
listen to your writer
something on the page
how to make yourself write a better story
a tree in a story about a forest
the reason God hasn't fixed you yet
great stories have memorable scenes

extremely loud & incredibly close, by jonathan safran foer
basically, this book is all over tumblr, whether people are quoting it or talking about how much they love it. naturally, i wanted to see what the fuss was all about, but i never really got around to reading it. mainly because reading it would require that i buy it and i'm pretty good at talking myself out of buying things.

well, the book was turned into a movie and if i wanted to read it before i watched it, i was going to have to suck it up and spend a few dollars. fortunately, i got a target gift card for Christmas and was able to find the non-movie cover version. score!

the book was pretty much as great as all the tumblr folk claim it to be, but it is a bit different. the writing style is unique and it's not your typical feel-good type of story. i loved it though, and like a million miles, i want to re-read it already. it was my first time reading it and i feel like there might be a lot of smaller details that i didn't pick up on the first time around.

one thing i noticed i picked up from reading extremely loud & incredibly close: i now frequently describe things as "extremely" or "incredibly." it hasn't started to annoy me yet though.

–– s

hello music.

let's just jump right in, shall we?

YOU CAN STREAM THE NEW FRAY ALBUM (scars & stories, due out on february 7) ON ITUNES. FOR FREE. RIGHT NOW. (CLICK HERE.)

ya'll, if that's not caps worthy, i don't know what is. i have basically been listening to the entire album on repeat. all day. i'm obsessed. but i did manage to squeeze in a few minutes of music browsing this week. here's what i got:

adam young on noisetrade.
this man is incredibly talented and this little sampler gives you a nice taste of his various styles. yes, various. he has three different projects: owl city, port blue, and sky sailing. they each have their own sound, so if you're not really in to owl city and his mainstream popularity, you might want to check out his other projects because, let me tell you, you are missing out.

elevation worship –– exalted One (single)
this one's a free download this week and i suggest you head over to your local itunes shop and pick it up. or download it. or whatever. why not? it's free. and it's also a pretty great song. it's probably only a matter of time before i crack and buy the whole album, actually. if the rest of the songs are as good as this one, and "give me faith" which i am also in love with, then it belongs in my itunes library. i'm just saying.
/ itunes

that's all for this week. there were a few things i added to my itunes wish list, but i ran out of gift card money so anything i buy is all out of my pocket. which means i have to really love it. or be in an impulsive mood, which i am not right now. plus, i don't really care to listen to anything other than the new fray album anyway, so it all works out in the end.

–– s